More encouraging for the future!

People can always learn a lot from the experienced people, I totally agree on it esp. from the Missionaries who dedicated their lives for Jesus.

 A day before I have learned that being a Missionary is ready to be suffered and sacrified their beloved ones.

Yesterday, I have learned that in the time of mission Satan will never slow down in attacking you and your family.

Islam talk is about the demolic religion in the sense that even you are Christian you will be grapped on the feet if ou are not alert, this missionary went to Malaysia with his a year-married beautiful to the field. And the people in the village hate they and asked for the help from the spiritual man who can heal and to curse. They put a cures in their house and wait for the sickness and conflict within the marriage. The missionary found that he and his wife had problems all the time but they did not know why. Later, his wife prayed about it and God showed her the reason behind. The missionary found out where the curse was and destroyed it. Later the Spiritual man came and checked on the situation. But he found they were fine and everything was great, he was cursious and told the missionary about the cursing thing, the missionary was shocked but he caught the chance to share the power of Jesus blood to them. The spiritual man was shocked in return and he runn to the village and told the whole wolrd about it. And by this some people trust God.

Another story is about the suffering of the missionary spouse, one time she was caught by 7 Muslims and they took off their clothes and tried to rape her, she screamed and the missionary heard it. He run to them and saved her form them but after it she could not sleep every night and she woke up from time to time. She collapesed totally and could not love the peopel there anymore. And the local people asked them to leave since it was hard for the missionary's wife. She prayed and prayed and asked for healing from God. During the prayers, she felt a cup of warm water pouring over her head and she was healed since she was beaten up in the events. She got healed and she recovered spiritually and physically.

Another mission conference in Alliance church, there was a beautiful girl who shared her experience in China mission. She decided to go the China for mission but during the time, her father was having coma and only a few days left. She was frustrated before the day she left and asked God for healing for her father, but fainally God took her father away...

Take up the cross, who did not deny everything and take up his cross, he/ she is not worthy of me...we are brought with Jesus' blood and our lives are not ours. What can we do for him?

From today I could not let Jesus down!

I have so many thing to do today but I could not concerntrate to talk to God; yesterday I had so many personal emotional to deal with then I failed to read Bibel; the day before I had so many friends to talk to so I had no time with God; 2 days before I had my exam to study by this God did not bother me; 3 days before....

Everyday I have so many things that hinder me from growing, the fire inside of me burn out, gets cool down...when the question come up ---"What are you really doing?"

Cheating in MSN with HK friends only;

Playing with the dog outside only;

Dealing with your hurt from people from the past;

Studying hard;

Stressful about study;

Planning Bible study;

Worrying about financial issue;

Family;

Friends;

the world?

All my vision and fire and mission mind are gone back to 3 years ago, they are thrown back to 3 yrs ago?

When the question---"What are you doing here?"---I could not answer God!

Today, luckily God grapped me through my classmate to the mission encounter---I got the challegene again with the same question! I know I know I know---I have to be filled with God's words and full of passion to wait upon his preparation! Jo have to come back from all the mess for the past 3 yrs, seek God kingdom first and all the things will follow! I have to wake up! Jo! Wake Up!

You and Me, together.

With the memory here,

You know me from the toe to my hair,

You've never leave wanna be here,

Heal the earth and sow your love inside of me,

You know me, You know me;

Come Holy Spirit revive me revive me with Your power,

Let me see, Let me see;

Holy Holy Holy Holy, You worhty, You're worthy of thee;

Break me and love me,

Comfort me, You lead me;

To you, to you;

And I wait for you, for the ages;

To You, I know for sure ...

Is LOVE an equation?

Talked to you for a long time, you have the struggle in feeling God's love? You doubt about the love of ppl, you think you love then ppl have to love you back. Going to church become an love exchange, when you + others doesnt = love, you doubt about the reason of going to church.

We love ppl and we want the equal love back from them. Then do we know why we love? We love for response or we love because we want to love. Can we still love someone who does not love us or reject our love? Is our love limited to certain level and we will withdraw?

If we cannot feel God's love, how can we really know how to love? What are we loving? We are loving each other or we are using love as a tool to gain love back? What love really is? Love become an empty action, we think we love but we aren't! We hurt each other in the process of love since we have purpose or as you call it "interest"!

It fails to satisfy us and it begins to make us doubt of everything, even the presence of God.

How to feel God's love? Is he real? What hinder us in feeling his love? What make us have the equation in giving and receiving love?

I know you know all the answer and you know I am really writing it to you and telling you you know the answer!

When will you let go of the "stuff" in your heart and open the door for him, facing him face to face!

I am waiting to hear the good news!

Reflecting in my too causal living attitude!

In the theological class, sudden had an idea coming up from mind---Am I not too serious about my life?

Well...friends for sure I am a goal-oriented person but ...the problem is when I really doing someting I am not really serious about it.

I only have interest in pursuing the goal for a very short while and then I lose my motive and finally because I have started I have to finish it! Man...that's not fun ...

In everything, I think I have the same attitude but except my faith since God really know me too well...if my life without challenges I definitely lost my faith already! That's why God make myself so up and down...hahaha that's fun!

If everytime I need challenges or conflicts then it stirs my motives...hmm...then when will I really get settle or stable? I don't think I can be always so energetic ...at least not till I am 80!!

So many room to grow and so many chancs to grab...well...when can I go back to heavens???